Here For A Reason

"For when David had served God's purpose in his own generation, he fell asleep; he was buried with his fathers and his body decayed." -- Acts 13:36 (NIV)

Our family returned to San Antonio this past weekend. We were blessed to be reunited with our oldest son. It was good to see, with my own eyes, that he has adjusted to his new living arrangement. It is obvious that he is thriving under the loving care of his host family. I am so grateful for their generosity.

On Sunday, we went to church. It was a day full of emotions... The feeling of coming home. The delight of seeing loved ones. The joy of being hugged well. The stirrings of the Spirit as God's people lifted their voices in song. A deep and abiding love for the people of God; His church. The knowledge that we haven't found anything like it (yet) in Flower Mound. Experiencing the pain of loss - all over again.

I listened to the Reverend Nathan Amooti, from Rwanda, preach a moving sermon on Acts 13:36. His message was powerful in its simplicity: each of us has been put on this earth for a purpose. His words reached right through my grief and spoke directly to my heart.

I have been put on this earth to do the will of God in my own generation.

I am in Flower Mound for a reason. I know this but, right now, it is hard to see His purpose in turning our lives upside down. It is too soon to understand God's reasons for bringing us here. So what do I do in the meantime?

What is my purpose?

As crazy as this might sound, I already know the answer. I am to continue on the course the Lord outlined for me, almost a year ago. (I just went back through my journals to find it). On Monday, April 28, 2008, I wrote,

"You (God) are affirming my sense that I am to focus on marriage, family and writing. I am to prepare myself for this work for the next two years. Go to Pastor R and Pastor C. Tell them what the Lord is calling me to do. I am not to undertake any leadership roles within the church during this time. Ask for their blessing and their spiritual covering over this season in my life."

Next to these words are the dates that I spoke with each of my pastors and explained what I felt God was calling me to do. Those were interesting meetings, by the way. We laughed as I turned down leadership positions for the next two years - that I hadn't been offered. They prayed blessings over me and the writing I was being called to - even though I hadn't written anything yet! They prayed over my family - even though there seemed to be no pressing need for prayer.

What a difference ten months makes. In hindsight, I am blown away by God's attention to my life...to the way He prepared me for the plans He had already set into motion!

My purpose? Until April of 2010, my focus is to be marriage, family and writing.

I confess that I do not see how doing these things will make a difference beyond my small circle of influence, let alone, in His Kingdom. That is the beauty of God. I don't need to know, or understand, or see. I just need to be obedient. If I can do that, then I will have served God's purpose in my generation. And, that will have been enough.

Abba,
You are a God of purpose and order. I confess that my vision is so short-sided that I have trouble understanding how my life and my actions could matter in Your bigger plan. And, yet, they do. I matter. The purpose You have set for my life matters. My obedience matters. I am mindful of my brothers and sisters in Christ. So many, Lord, do not have any idea what Your purpose is for their lives. Speak to them. May they stop to listen. May they not dismiss Your call. Help us to see that we are all connected. Our obedience matters. It sends ripples throughout your Kingdom even if we don't have the eyes to see. Lead us, Lord, to serve You in this generation. In Christ's Holy Name, Amen.