Relating to Jesus

"Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit in the desert, where for forty days he was tempted by the devil. He ate nothing during those days, and at the end of them he was hungry." Luke 4:1-2

I pray to God the Father and go to Him for strength and courage.
I listen and follow the leading of the Holy Spirit.
But when it comes to Jesus, I have a confession to make:

I struggle to relate to him on a day-to-day basis.

And because of my struggle, it has been my prayer, for some time now, to know him better. I want my relationship with Jesus to be more than gratitude for the gift of salvation. For too long I have treated him like fancy china that only gets taken out on special occasions. I am convinced that my life will be richer by inviting him to ordinary meals served on everyday dishes and the occasional paper plate. I just don't know how to do that, yet.

That is what this year's Lenten journey has become for me...a daily meal in the Word followed by reflection and dialogue with Jesus. I have submitted to the discipline of responding to the day's reading in light of Jesus and my relation to him. It has been a blessing and a challenge and a necessity. I can't move on in my day if I don't spend this time with him.

Today, when I think about Jesus' 40 days of being tempted in the desert, I am aware of an ongoing sticking point in my faith. I try to imagine what Jesus' time was like; hungry, the devil constantly in his face dangling propositions that would trip up the best of men. I am amazed at Jesus' responses but sooner or later I always add the asterisk *Well, yeah but, Jesus was God, so of course he could resist the devil.

So there it is: I relate to Jesus, up to a point, and then I add, somewhere in the back of my head, the asterisk. If I am completely honest and follow this line of personal thinking then what I am really saying is that somehow it was easier for him to resist temptation than it is for me.

The asterisk line of thinking brings about two consequences: I allow myself a way out from even trying to live up to the example of Christ. And I place distance between myself and my Savior.

Neither is acceptable to God. I am finally in a place in my journey where this is no longer acceptable to me.

Jesus, I want you to be a part of my life each and every day. Forgive me. Teach me. In your name I pray, Amen.