Giving Out of Poverty

Jesus sat down opposite the place where the offerings were put and watched the crowd putting their money into the temple treasury. Many rich people threw in large amounts. But a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins, worth only a fraction of a penny.

Calling his disciples to him, Jesus said, "I tell you the truth, this poor widow has put more into the treasury than all the others. They all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of her poverty, put in everything - all she had to live on." Mark 12:41-44

Jesus has positioned himself directly opposite the treasury. He watches as the people bring their money and throw it into the collection box. He is close enough to see even the smallest of coins (v.42).

Do the people see him? I believe so. I think they are aware of Jesus as they make their deposit. Are they unnerved by his presence? Do they meet his eyes and hold his gaze or do they quickly look away?

What does Jesus see? It is more than the quantity of coins.

He sees the pride in the one who makes a show of pouring in a great quantity.
He sees the defiance in the one who shortchanges God in order to keep more for himself.
He sees the clear conscience of the one who has brought what is required.
He sees the extravagant faith offering disguised by the confines of poverty.

He sees and he knows the condition of each individual's heart.

When I open my wallet to give of my finances...
When I open my calendar to give of my time...
When I open my heart to give of myself...

He sees and he knows the condition of my heart.

His words to the disciples, that day, remind me that Jesus does not measure the way the world measures. Jesus does not reward the way the world rewards. It is never about what I do in comparison with what someone else does. It is only about what I do in relation to who He is.

I am struggling with this. There is still a part of me that wants reassurance; wants a way to quantify my service to the Lord so I know I am doing enough.

Moving a year ago, all the while, heeding His order to be still and wait for direction has placed me in a physical, emotional, and spiritual poverty. For over 365 days, I haven't been called on to open my wallet, calendar or heart in the ways I am used to. I am in uncharted territory.

He has been teaching me about living in the poverty of stillness. He has confronted me with the poverty of waiting. I have discovered the poverty that comes from being unsure of every single thing in my life except for the reality that God is God.

Truly, my offerings to Him during this time have been meager. And yet, Jesus assures me that He is pleased.

Thank you, Jesus, for your assurance this day. Your pleasure is food for my hungry soul. Thank you.