"Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands." Deuteronomy 8:2
Desert time.
A time for humbling.
A time for testing.
A time for knowing what is in my heart.
A time for seeing whether or not I will keep His commands.
It hasn't been 40 years but it has been almost two. A desert time of waiting, announced in advance by the Spirit; April 2008-April 2010. In the last 23 months, I have been humbled and tested; blessed and grieved as the contents of my heart have been exposed; victorious and defeated (at least, temporarily) when it comes to keeping His commands.
It is fitting that the last portion of my desert time coincides with Lent. God the Father has turned my eyes towards God the Son. I am framing the lessons I have learned and continue to learn through the teachings of the Spirit by studying Jesus.
How did he handle humbling?
How did he handle testing?
The contents of his heart were beyond reproach but how did he respond when he saw the contents of the hearts of the men and women around him?
How did he follow God's commands?
There is only one Jesus. And no matter how hard I try, I will never live up to the standards he set while he walked this earth. I'm learning to be okay with that mostly because I have come to accept that there is only one me.
Jesus knows me. Were he standing before me now I'm convinced that he would speak to me truthfully about the state of my heart; no sugar coating for him. It would be worth it. It is worth it to hear the truth spoken in love...to be exposed by the Light...in order to know the love of Jesus.
"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:2
Showing posts with label Heart. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Heart. Show all posts
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Head Knowledge vs Heart Knowledge
Immediately the boy's father exclaimed, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!" Mark 9:23
From Mark 9:14-29 The Healing of a Boy From an Evil Spirit
I am seeing this story with new eyes, today.
Thank you, Jesus, for meeting me in between the lines of God's most holy Word.
Jesus, Peter, James and John catch up to the other disciples and find them surrounded by a crowd and teachers of the law. They are in the middle of an argument.
Jesus asks, "What are you arguing with them about?" v. 16
I assume he has directed the question to his disciples and, yet, a stranger from the crowd takes it upon himself to answer.
"Teacher, I brought you my son, who is possessed by a spirit that has robbed him of speech. Whenever it seizes him, it throws him to the ground. He foams at the mouth, gnashes his teeth and becomes rigid. I asked your disciples to drive out the spirit, but they could not." v. 17-18
There is something so disturbing about this father's lack of emotion as he matter-of-factly lists his son's symptoms as if reading a medical chart. Where is his urgency? Why does he waste time outlining the facts when he could take advantage of his one-on-one encounter with the Healer and appeal to him for help for his child?
Instead of responding to the man, Jesus responds to the crowd,
"O unbelieving generation, how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy to me." v. 19
The weight of his words hangs heavy in the air. How long do I have to put up with your lack of faith?
The boy is brought to Jesus and immediately falls to the ground in convulsions.
Jesus asks the father a question,
"How long has he been like this?" v 21
Why doesn't he just heal the boy? Why does he need to ask the father this question?
Because the father needs healing, too.
Earlier in the gospel of Mark we are told that Jesus' work is limited when there is a lack of faith (Mark 6:5-6).
With every question the father answers, he sheds further light on the unbelieving condition of his heart. There is no connection between his head knowledge and his heart knowledge.
If he were responding from his heart how could he have tolerated questions and answers while his son lay writhing on the ground? Why would he be willing to wait even a second longer for his son's healing? Why doesn't he do what so many before him have done; throw himself at Jesus' feet and beg (Mark 1:40; 2:1-2; 5:21-34; 5:35-43; 6:56; 7:24-30; 8:22-26)?
It turns out he is every bit as sick as his son.
"But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us." v.22
The father's reply, in the context of his earlier responses, shows that he doesn't really expect Jesus to help him. He doesn't believe Jesus can help him.
Jesus replies to the man's lack of faith with strong words,
"If you can? Everything is possible for him who believes." v. 23
In that moment, the man's life changes forever. Was it Jesus' words? Was it the tone of voice? Or was it the look in Jesus' eyes that made the father realize just who he was speaking to?
For the first time, he responds from the heart,
"I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!" v. 24
He is willing and ready to believe. His heart is split wide open and the long buried hopes and dreams of a father, for a son, rise to the surface.
Without wasting another moment, Jesus rebukes the evil spirit and the boy is free.
Later, the disciples ask Jesus why they couldn't drive out the evil spirit (v. 28). He responds, "This kind can come out only by prayer and fasting." v. 29
I've always thought Jesus was referring to the evil spirit when he said, "This kind." Now, I'm not so sure that he wasn't referring to the bigger healing that had to take place in this family. The father had to be healed in order to bring his son to Jesus.
Jesus moves in response to our heart cry. He heals when our posture reflects a humble, hungry, hopeful heart.
This kind of healing...this bigger picture healing, is hard work.
Prayers...
Fasting...
We, the disciples of Christ, are called to believe on behalf of those who have yet to make a connection between their head knowledge and their heart knowledge. We must hold them up to the throne of God until they can encounter Jesus for themselves.
Jesus, help me to be willing to do the hard work on behalf of those who do not know you yet. I love you. In your name, Amen.
From Mark 9:14-29 The Healing of a Boy From an Evil Spirit
I am seeing this story with new eyes, today.
Thank you, Jesus, for meeting me in between the lines of God's most holy Word.
Jesus, Peter, James and John catch up to the other disciples and find them surrounded by a crowd and teachers of the law. They are in the middle of an argument.
Jesus asks, "What are you arguing with them about?" v. 16
I assume he has directed the question to his disciples and, yet, a stranger from the crowd takes it upon himself to answer.
"Teacher, I brought you my son, who is possessed by a spirit that has robbed him of speech. Whenever it seizes him, it throws him to the ground. He foams at the mouth, gnashes his teeth and becomes rigid. I asked your disciples to drive out the spirit, but they could not." v. 17-18
There is something so disturbing about this father's lack of emotion as he matter-of-factly lists his son's symptoms as if reading a medical chart. Where is his urgency? Why does he waste time outlining the facts when he could take advantage of his one-on-one encounter with the Healer and appeal to him for help for his child?
Instead of responding to the man, Jesus responds to the crowd,
"O unbelieving generation, how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy to me." v. 19
The weight of his words hangs heavy in the air. How long do I have to put up with your lack of faith?
The boy is brought to Jesus and immediately falls to the ground in convulsions.
Jesus asks the father a question,
"How long has he been like this?" v 21
Why doesn't he just heal the boy? Why does he need to ask the father this question?
Because the father needs healing, too.
Earlier in the gospel of Mark we are told that Jesus' work is limited when there is a lack of faith (Mark 6:5-6).
With every question the father answers, he sheds further light on the unbelieving condition of his heart. There is no connection between his head knowledge and his heart knowledge.
If he were responding from his heart how could he have tolerated questions and answers while his son lay writhing on the ground? Why would he be willing to wait even a second longer for his son's healing? Why doesn't he do what so many before him have done; throw himself at Jesus' feet and beg (Mark 1:40; 2:1-2; 5:21-34; 5:35-43; 6:56; 7:24-30; 8:22-26)?
It turns out he is every bit as sick as his son.
"But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us." v.22
The father's reply, in the context of his earlier responses, shows that he doesn't really expect Jesus to help him. He doesn't believe Jesus can help him.
Jesus replies to the man's lack of faith with strong words,
"If you can? Everything is possible for him who believes." v. 23
In that moment, the man's life changes forever. Was it Jesus' words? Was it the tone of voice? Or was it the look in Jesus' eyes that made the father realize just who he was speaking to?
For the first time, he responds from the heart,
"I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!" v. 24
He is willing and ready to believe. His heart is split wide open and the long buried hopes and dreams of a father, for a son, rise to the surface.
Without wasting another moment, Jesus rebukes the evil spirit and the boy is free.
Later, the disciples ask Jesus why they couldn't drive out the evil spirit (v. 28). He responds, "This kind can come out only by prayer and fasting." v. 29
I've always thought Jesus was referring to the evil spirit when he said, "This kind." Now, I'm not so sure that he wasn't referring to the bigger healing that had to take place in this family. The father had to be healed in order to bring his son to Jesus.
Jesus moves in response to our heart cry. He heals when our posture reflects a humble, hungry, hopeful heart.
This kind of healing...this bigger picture healing, is hard work.
Prayers...
Fasting...
We, the disciples of Christ, are called to believe on behalf of those who have yet to make a connection between their head knowledge and their heart knowledge. We must hold them up to the throne of God until they can encounter Jesus for themselves.
Jesus, help me to be willing to do the hard work on behalf of those who do not know you yet. I love you. In your name, Amen.
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